Gods 014: Family Feud

Nezha “returns his flesh and blood” to his parents, in the most literal way.

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Transcript

Welcome to the Chinese Lore Podcast, where I retell classic Chinese stories in English. This is episode 14 of Investiture of the Gods. 

Last time, Nezha had barely finished escalating the bad blood between him and the dragon king Ao (2) Guang (1) before he ticked off another magical being by unknowingly killing one of Lady Stone’s disciples. Instead of apologizing, he proceeded to escalate on that front, too, but soon found himself outmatched. So he fled to seek help from his master, Fairy Primordial. Fairy Primordial told Lady Stone to back off, but she was having none of it.

“Lady Stone,” Fairy Primordial said to her, “you claim that your skills are formidable. You belong to the Jie (2) sect of Daoism, while I belong to the Chan (2) sect. My generation of disciples have not yet weaned ourselves of desire after 1,500 years of studying the Way. We are destined to break the commandment on killing, so we have been sent down into the world to meet our fate.”

And then he proceeded to dish out some more spoilers before getting to his point: “Nezha is the reincarnation of the Pearl Spirit. He was sent by my master’s orders. All that he has done, including killing your disciple, is predestined. Beings like you need to know neither worry nor sorrow, neither glory nor humiliation. You should focus on cultivating your understanding of the Way. Why get so worked up over such a small thing and set yourself back?”

Lady Stone did not take kindly to that. She raised her sword and made straight for Fairy Primordial. He dodged her blow and ducked back inside his cave. He grabbed his sword and stashed something else, too. He bowed toward the East, in the direction of the Kunlun (1,2) Mountain, where his master the Heavenly Primogenitor lived, and said, “Your disciple must break the commandment against killing today.”

He then went back outside, pointed at Lady Stone, and said, “Your understanding of the Way is superficial. How dare you act up on my mountain?”

Lady Stone took another swing at him, and he blocked it with his sword. The two of them then went at it, trading blows. After a few exchanges, Lady Stone tossed her Dragon Beard Handkerchief into the air to capture her enemy, but Fairy Primordial laughed and said, “How can evil conquer good?” He uttered an incantation, pointed at the handkerchief, and said, “Fall!” 

Immediately, the magic handkerchief fell harmlessly to the ground. This infuriated Lady Stone further, and she came charging at her enemy with her sword again. 

“Alas, I have no choice at this point,” Fairy Primordial said. He leaped backward and tossed an object into the air. It was something called the Nine Dragon Magical Fire Dome. It came down right on top of Lady Stone, trapping her inside it. 

Watching this from the cave entrance, Nezha sighed and said, “If my master had given that to me, then I wouldn’t have had any trouble at all.”

He now came out of the cave and walked toward his master. Fairy Primordial saw him and muttered, “You little brat. You just saw this treasure and you already want to take it. But it’s not yours to have yet. One day, though.”

He now shouted to Nezha, “Hurry on home! The dragon kings of the four seas have lodged a complaint with the Jade Emperor and are going to apprehend your parents.”

When he heard that, Nezha’s eyes welled up with tears, and he begged his master, “Please take pity on my parents. This is all my doing. How can I let them suffer?”

As he spoke, he broke down and wept aloud. Seeing this, his master whispered a few words in his ears and sent him on his way. 

Then, Fairy Primordial turned his attention back to Lady Stone. She was trapped inside his magical dome, where she couldn’t tell up from down. He now tapped the dome twice, and nine fire dragons appeared inside the cocoon and coiled themselves around Lady Stone, burning her with sacred flames until they had reduced her back to her original form, a large, uncut stone. 

As it turns out, Lady Stone’s name was quite literal. She was a rock of supernatural origins. After millennia of weathering the elements and cultivating her Dao, she had attained human form and honed magical powers. And yet, she was destined to meet her end on this day. Having defeated his foe, Fairy Primordial collected the magical items of his that she had taken from Nezha and went back into his cave.

Meanwhile, at Chentang Pass, Nezha arrived back home and found all hell breaking loose. The four dragon kings were there on the jade emperor’s command to arrest Li Jing and his wife. Nezha stomped in and shouted, “A man must answer for his own actions. I was the one who committed the murders. I will pay with my life. My actions should not burden my parents!”

He then turned to the dragon king Ao Guang and said, “I am no ordinary mortal. I am the reincarnation of the Pearl Spirit and was sent to this world on the command of the Heavenly Primogenitor. Today, I will cut open my belly, pull out my intestines, break my bones, and return my flesh and blood to my parents so as not to make them suffer for my actions. Will that do? If not, then we can go to see the jade emperor together, and I’ll talk to him about it.”

Hearing this, Ao Guang relented. “Fine,” he said. “It is a filial act for you to do so to save your parents.”

So the dragon kings released Li Jing and his wife. Nezha now picked up a sword with his right hand, and hacked off his left arm. Then, he sliced open his own belly, gouged out his intestines, and broke  his bones. And then, he was dead. 

Thus contented, the dragon kings left to report back to the jade emperor. Left in their wake were Li Jing and his wife. I can only imagine what the kind of trauma they were dealing with, having just watched their 7-year-old son commit suicide in the most gruesome way. In any case, Li Jing’s wife arranged to have Nezha’s remains buried, and that was that.

Except, it wasn’t. Nezha may have shuffled off his mortal coil, but his spirit was very much alive and hanging around. It drifted with the wind back to his master’s residence on Qianyuan Mountain. There, his master told him, “This is not the place for you. Go back to Chentang Pass and enter your mother’s dreams. About 15 miles outside the pass is Jade Screen Mountain. There is an empty area on that mountain. Tell your mother to build a temple for you there, so that you may receive offerings. Once you have received worship for three years, you will be reincarnated into human form again so that you may assist the sage lord. Go quickly, and don’t delay.”

So Nezha’s spirit went off to Chentang Pass and waited until midnight. While his mother was asleep, he entered her chamber and called out, “Mother, it’s me, your child Nezha. My spirit is drifting aimlessly. On account of my awful death, I hope you will erect a temple for me on Jade Screen Mountain 15 miles from here, so that I may receive some incense and offerings and ascend to heaven. I would be grateful for your kindness.”

When his mother woke up, she started to weep, and her husband, Li Jing, asked her why she was crying. But when she recounted her dream, he was irate.

“That’s what you’re crying over?!” he fumed. “How much harm did that brat cause us? As the old saying goes, ‘Dreams are borne from your thoughts.’ You had that dream because you keep thinking about him. Stop it!”

So uh, way to be a horrible husband and father there, buddy. But despite Li Jing’s anger, his wife had the same dream every day for the next five or six days. Eventually, Nezha said to her, “I’ve been begging you for days, and yet you keep refusing to build me a temple, despite my horrible death. Fine, I’ll keep bugging you forever!”

So, this poor woman was caught between her terrible husband and her dead child’s whiny spirit. So she went behind Li Jing’s back and ordered some confidants to secretly pay some workers to erect a temple on Jade Screen Mountain. Inside the temple, they put up an earthen statue of Nezha. After 10 months, the construction was finished, and Nezha’s spirit started appearing on the mountain and granting all of his worshippers’ wishes. So the offerings started rolling in, and the temple was quite prosperous.

While all this was happening, Li Jing was too busy to notice because he was consumed with training his troops and keeping up a tight defense on his pass while the rebels in the East continued to make noise even though they were struggling to penetrate into the Shang empire’s central region. One day, after drills outside the city, Li Jing and his army were returning home when they passed Jade Screen Mountain. Li Jing noticed tons of people, old and young, streaming up and down the mountainside. He asked his men what’s the reason for all the hubbub, and one of his officers said, “Half a year ago, a spirit appeared here and has been granting wishes and working miracles. So people are coming from all over to offer him incense.”

“What’s this spirit’s name?” Li Jing asked.

The officer was like, umm, ohh, you know, no one really. Nezha? And Li Jing promptly blew his lid.

“Pitch camp! I’m going to make an offering,” he barked. 

While his troops holed up at the foot of the mountain, Li Jing rode up to the temple, parting the crowd on his way. He saw a sign hanging high on the temple door that said, “Temple of Nezha.” And when he entered the temple, he saw Nezha’s statue, flanked by the statues of two demon judges from the underworld.

Pointing at his son’s likeness, Li Jing cursed, “You wretch! In life, you brought harm upon your parents! And in death, you’re deceiving civilians!”

As he cursed, Li Jing raised his metal staff and smashed Nezha’s earthen statue to smithereens. Still not satisfied, he kicked over the demon judges’ statues as well. He then ordered his men to set fire to the temple, while telling the civilians, “This is no god! No incense offering is allowed here!”

While the frightened civilians scurried off the mountain, Li Jing got back on his horse, still burning hot with anger. When he returned to Chentang Pass, he dismissed his army and stomped into his private quarters and unloaded on his wife.

“That good son you gave birth to caused me endless troubles, and yet you have built him a temple to deceive the civilians. Are you trying to cost me my position? Right now wicked officials hold power at court, and I’m not acquainted with the likes of Fei (4) Zhong (4) and You (2) Hun (2). If word of this reaches the capital and those wicked officials accuse me of making up a false god, all my labor would be for naught. This is all your doing, woman! Well, I burned that temple today. If you dare to build another one, you’ll piss me off again!”

[Sigh] So, let’s leave Li Jing to dig himself into an ever deeper hole and go check in on the spirit of Nezha. He was out that day when Li Jing visited his temple. When he returned later, he found that his temple was no more, and that a fire raged where it once stood. The two demon judges came to him while crying, and Nezha asked them what the heck happened.

“Commander Li suddenly appeared on the mountain,” they told him. “We don’t know why, but he smashed your statue and burned your temple.”

Nezha was incensed. “Li Jing, I have no connection with you anymore,” he thought to himself. “I have already returned my mortal coil to you and my mother by killing myself. So why did you smash my statue and burn my temple, denying me a place to call home?”

The more he thought about it, the more restless he became, so Nezha decided to go pay his master a visit. So by now, Nezha had been receiving offerings for half a year, and he was able to regain some physical form and voice. When he arrived at the cave of his master, Fairy Primordial, he kneeled and told his master what happened and begged him for help.

“Li Jing, you’re really in the wrong here,” Fairy Primordial said. “Nezha had already returned his physical body to you. He wasn’t bothering  you on Jade Screen Mountain. Why did you make it impossible for him to receive offerings? Now how is he going to regain his physical form? And the appointed hour is drawing near. Fine, I’m going to do you a favor today.”

He then summoned his acolyte and told him, “Go to my Five Lotus Pond and pluck two lotus flowers and three lotus leaves.”

The acolyte brought the flowers and leaves and put them on the floor. Fairy Primordial then pulled off all the petals and arranged them in three piles. He then broke the stems of the flowers into 300 pieces to represent 300 bones. Finally, he put a lotus leaf on each of the three piles of petals to represent heaven, earth, and man. All this done, he put a grain of golden elixir in the center and infused this creation with his own vital energies.

Now, he grabbed Nezha’s spirit and threw it into the arrangement and shouted, “What are you waiting for, Nezha? You have regained your human form!”

With a loud bang, a figure leaped out of the lotus pile. His face was as white as powder, his lips were as red as rouge, his eyes were gleaming, and he stood 17 feet tall.

Nezha, in his dashing new form, kneeled in front of his master, who told him, “It’s really heartbreaking that Li Jing smashed your statue.”

Nezha replied, “Master, I cannot rest until I have avenged this.”

“Then follow me to the peach orchard,” Fairy Primordial told him. 

In the peach garden, Nezha received a fire-tip spear, which he mastered within moments. Now, he was itching to leave to go seek revenge. His master said, “Now that you have learned to use the spear, let me give you two wind-and-fire wheels. When you stand on them, they will carry you to wherever you wish at great speed. I’ll teach you the spells.”

In addition to these new toys, Fairy Primordial also gave Nezha a leopard skin pouch that contained his magical bracelet the Universal Ring, his Sky-Muddling Red Damask, and a golden brick.

“Now, go on to Chentang Pass,” Fairy Primordial instructed.

Nezha kneeled to thank him and then hopped on his hot wheels and flew off, with his mind firmly fixed on revenge.

Over at Chentang Pass, Li Jing was chilling at home when suddenly, a panicked officer ran in and said, “Your third son is outside, riding on two wind-and-fire wheels, wielding a fiery-tip spear, and demanding to see you.”

“Nonsense!” Li Jing scolded him. “How can the dead come back to life?”

Before he was done talking though, another attendant rushed in and said, “Master, if you don’t go out right now, he’s going to charge in here!”

Li Jing was pissed, so he grabbed his halberd, hopped on his horse, and galloped outside. There, he saw his son, but quite a bit taller than before and wielding some fancy new gear, all with fire coming out of them.

Li Jing was stunned, but apparently not so stunned that he could even bother to pretend to be nice to his dead son for a minute. 

“You wretch!” he cursed. “In life you caused trouble. What are you doing back here now that you’re a dead spirit?!”

Nezha fumed, “Li Jing, I had already returned my flesh and blood to you and had nothing more to do with you. Why did you go on Jade Screen Mountain and smash my statue and burn my temple?! I’m coming to capture you today to pay you back!”

As he spoke, Nezha hoisted his spear and made straight for Li Jing’s head. Li Jing raised his halberd to counter. But this reincarnation of Nezha was immensely strong, and after trading just a few blows, Li Jing was already exhausted and covered in sweat. So he galloped toward the southeast.

“Li Jing, don’t think I will spare you today!” Nezha shouted. “If I don’t kill you, I will not stop!”

As Li Jing fled, he could hear Nezha’s wind-and-fire wheels whirling behind him. He turned and saw Nezha closing fast. Panicked, Li Jing ditched his horse and worked a little Daoist magic to fast-travel by earth. 

Seeing this, Nezha was like, Puhleeze. That’s Daoist Magic 101 stuff. He now continued his pursuit, and his wheels propelled him like lightning. Li Jing saw him closing fast and thought, “If he catches me, he’s going to run me through with his spear. What should I do?!”

As he was panicking, he suddenly heard someone approaching while singing a song. The song said:

The moon shines over the clear still waters,

On the bank, peach flowers and willows grow.

This is a scene of no ordinary beauty,

High in the sky, the dawn clouds glow.

Li Jing looked in the direction of the song and saw a young Daoist coming. He immediately recognized him. This was his second son, Muzha (4,1), who had been studying under a Daoist master named Immortal Universal Virtue., 

“Father, I’m here,” Muzha shouted, much to Li Jing’s relief. He then moved forward to meet his baby brother and shouted to Nezha, “Stop, you wretch! It’s an unpardonable crime for a son to kill his father! Go away now, and I’ll spare you!”

“Who the hell are you to talk trash to me?!” Nezha scoffed.

“Do you not recognize me? I’m your second brother Muzha.”

“Oh, brother, it’s you!” Nezha said. “You don’t understand.” 

Nezha then explained the backstory and then asked, “So who do you think is at fault here, me or Li Jing?”

But Muzha shouted, “Nonsense! Parents are never at fault!”

Nezha was like, wait, hold on. Let me finish. He then recounted how he cut open his own belly, gouged out his intestines, and broke his own bones to basically sever all ties with Li Jing. “There is nothing between me and him now,” he said. “He’s not my father.”

But Muzha fumed. “You unfilial son!” he cursed as he raised his sword and took a swing at Nezha. Nezha blocked his attack with the spear and said, “Muzha, there is no bad blood between us. Stand aside and let me have my revenge on Li Jing.”

“You unfilial wretch!” Muzha cursed as he took another swing.

“This must be predestined,” Nezha thought to himself. “He’s willing to trade his life for Li Jing’s.”

So Nezha now hoisted his spear and traded blows with his brother. As they fought, Nezha saw that Li Jing was standing off to the side. He was worried Li Jing might use this opportunity to run away, so he tried to end the fight quickly. He used his spear to deflect Muzha’s sword. At the same time, he pulled out the new golden brick he had received from his master and hurled it into the air. The brick flew at Muzha from behind and struck him in the back. It didn’t kill him, but it did knock him down to the ground. 

Nezha now made straight for Li Jing, who immediately took off.

“Even if I have to chase you to the ends of the earth, I will have your head to quench my thirst for revenge!” Nezha shouted.

Li Jing just kept running like a bird that had lost its perch and a fish that had slipped through the net. He had no idea where he was fleeing to; he was just fleeing. After the pursuit went on for a while, Li Jing started to despair. He sighed and said, “Ala, alas! I don’t know what sins I committed in my previous life to merit this fate. I failed in my pursuit of immortality, and now I’ve been beset by such calamity. It must be preordained. Why don’t I just fall on my sword so that I don’t have suffer humiliation at my son’s hands.”

Just as he was about to kill himself, though, Li Jing suddenly heard someone call out to him, “General Li, don’t do it! I’m coming!”

And then, that person started to sing a song, which went:

Warm winds caress the willow trees,

And on the pool sweet petals float.

You ask me where it is I dwell,

I answer, “In white clouds remote.”

This man was another Daoist master. His name was Heavenly Master of Outstanding Culture. He also went by the name Wenzhu (2,1). He was one of the initial class of 12 disciples of the Heavenly Primogenitor, the founder of the Chan sect of Daoism. All 12 of those disciples were immortals, so Wenzhu was a senior figure in the sect. And more pertinent for Li Jing, he was also the master of Li Jing’s eldest son, Jinzha (1,4). 

“Master, save me!” Li Jing shouted.

“Go on into my cave,” Wenzhu (2,1) told him. “I will wait here for Nezha.”

Momentarily, Nezha showed up with a full head of steam. When he saw a Daoist priest standing on the hillside and no sign of Li Jin, he asked Wenzhu if he had seen an officer go by.

“General Li just went into my cave,” Wenzhu said. “Why do you ask?”

“Priest, he’s my nemesis,” Nezha said. “If you know what’s good for you, then send him out. If you let him get away, then you can take three pokes from my spear for him.”

“Who are you, and why are you so vicious that you would even threaten me?” Wenzhu asked.

Nezha had no idea who he was talking to, so he boasted, “I am Nezha, a disciple of Fairy Primordial of Golden Light Cave on Qianyuan (2,2) Mountain. Don’t underestimate me!”

“Well, I haven’t heard that Fairy Primordial had any disciple named Nezha,” Wenzhu retorted. “Your shenanigans might fly elsewhere, but not here. Try it, and I will capture you and leave you hanging in my peach orchard for three years and give you a caning of 300 strokes.”

Nezha was enraged and stabbed at Wenzhu. Wenzhu turned and retreated toward his cave, and Nezha gave chase. He looked back and saw Nezha closing in, so he pulled out a magical item from his robe. It’s called the Dragon Binding Stake. He tossed it into the air, and immediately a huge wind kicked up, creating a swirl of dust and clouds. Nezha was trapped in the midst of this whirlwind and couldn’t tell which way was up. Suddenly, he found himself tightly bound to the stake by golden rings around his neck, arms, and legs. 

“What a wretch. You’ve got some gall,” Wenzhu scolded Nezha. He then summoned his disciple and Nezha’s eldest brother, Jinzha. “Bring me a cane.”

Jinzha brought out the cane, and Wenzhu told him, “Give him a beating.”

Jinzha did as he was commanded and gave Nezha a thorough caning. Wenzhu then told Jinzha to stop and they both went inside his cave, leaving Nezha tightly bound to the stake outside. Nezha was seething, but could do nothing but stand there, unable to move even an inch. Just as he was stewing in his anger, however, he saw his master, Fairy Primordial, approaching.

“Master, save me!” Nezha shouted time and again. But his master didn’t even acknowledge him, and just walked right on by and into Wenzhu’s cave. 

Inside the cave, Wenzhu greeted Fairy Primordial. So these two were school chums, as they were both members of that first class of 12 disciples who studied under the Heavenly Primogenitor. 

Wenzhu said with a laugh, “He’s your disciple, but you’re making me discipline him.”

“He’s too violent, so I sent him here to temper his nature,” Fairy Primordial said as they sat down. “I’m sorry if he offended you.”

Wenzhu now instructed Jinzha to release his brother. Jinzha walked out to the stake and told Nezha, “Your master is summoning you.”

“Your master was no match for me,” Nezha scoffed. “And yet he used some devious trick to immobilize me. And now you’re here to taunt me.”

Jinzha laughed and said, “Close your eyes.”

Nezha had  no choice but to do as he said. Jinzha then drew a charm to remove the magic stake. When Nezha opened his eyes, he found that his restraints had vanished.

“Great!” He said. “I’ve suffered too much today. Let me go inside and see my master first, and then I’ll deal with this.”

The two of them then went into the cave, where Nezha saw his master sitting next to the priest that had beaten him.

“Come over and bow to your uncle,” Fairy Primordial said, and he’s using the word “uncle” here as a respectful title for a senior fellow trainee member of a school. 

Nezha dared not go disobey his master, so he kneeled, paid his respects to Wenzhu, and said, “Thank you for the caning.” He then turned and kneeled to his master.

Fairy Primordial now summoned Li Jing, who came over and also kneeled. Fairy Primordial told him, “What you did on Jade Screen Mountain was too narrow-minded. That’s what caused this hostility between you and your son.”

This whole time, Nezha was standing there, about to blow up and swallow Li Jing whole. The two immortals, of course, took note, and Fairy Primordial told father and son, “From now on, you two must not clash anymore.” 

He then told Li Jing to go on home first. Li Jing thanked him and walked out of the cave. Nezha was irate, but dared not speak. He just kept shifting restlessly and sighing. Fairy Primordial tried his best to not crack up. He then told Nezha, “You go on back to my cave and keep watch there. I am going to play some chess with your uncle and will be back later.”

“Yes sir!” Nezha quickly answered and rushed out of the cave.

So, take one guess as to what Nezha was going to do. To see whether Li Jing will survive this latest encounter with his son, tune in to the next episode of the Chinese Lore Podcast. Thanks for listening!

Music in This Episode

• “Sao Meo” by Doug Maxwell / Zac Zinger
• “Dark Toys” by SYBS (from YouTube audio library)
• “Slow Times Over Here” by Midnight North (from YouTube audio library)
• “The Quiet Aftermath by Sir Cubworth (from YouTube audio library)
• “Ravines” by Elphnt (from YouTube audio library)