Journey 017: Jagged Little Pill
The Black Bear Demon finds out that it doesn’t feel so good to have a monkey swimming in your stomach.
Podcast: Play in new window | Download
Transcript
Welcome to the Chinese Lore Podcast, where I retell classic Chinese stories in English. This is episode 17 of Journey to the West.
Last time, Tang San Zang and Sun Wukong found themselves staying at the worst Airbnb ever. Their hosts, the monks of the Guanyin Monastery, tried to burn them to death because they coveted the pilgrims’ precious cassock. Thankfully, Sun Wukong used some magic to protect his master. But while the monastery burned, a black demon from nearby Black Wind Mountain stole the cassock. Wukong tracked him down at his lair, but after they fought for a bit, the demon hid in his cave, shut Wukong out, and went about his business of sending out invitations to fellow demons for his birthday party, aka the Buddhist Robe Banquet.
Wukong, meanwhile, had no choice but to return to the Guanyin Monastery for the time being. While he was gone, the monks at the monastery buried the body of their Patriarch, whose greed had started all this trouble and led to his own death when he killed himself in a panic after discovering that the cassock had disappeared. Having been put on notice by Wukong, the monks were busy tending to San Zang’s every need when they saw Wukong descend from the sky and go inside San Zang’s room.
When his master asked if he had retrieved the cassock, Wukong said, “I found it. Turns out these monks weren’t responsible for its disappearance. The demon on Black Wind Mountain stole it. I tracked him down in secret and saw him sitting on a grassy knoll, talking with a scholar and an old Daoist. He spilled the beans without me even needing to beat it out of him. He said his birthday is coming up and that he had obtained a fancy Buddhist cassock as a gift. He was going to host a Buddhist Robe Banquet. I charged in and tried to hit him. The black demon turned into a gust of wind and fled, and the Daoist also ran away. But I killed the scholar, who turned out to be a snake demon. Then I chased the black demon to his cave and demanded to fight him. He admitted that he took the cassock. Then we fought for half a day without a winner. He ran inside his cave to have lunch, but he shut the stone gates and refused to come out. So I came back to let you know this intel first. Now that I know where the cassock is, I’ll get it back for sure.”
The other monks prayed to heaven when they heard this, exclaiming, “The cassock has been found! We get to live!”
“Don’t celebrate yet,” Wukong scolded them. “I don’t have it in hand yet, and my master hasn’t left yet. You’re not in the clear until I have the cassock and my master is given a proper sendoff. If you mistreat him in the slightest, you’ll have to answer to me. Have you served my master good tea and food? Have you fed our horse some good grass?”
“Yes, yes, yes!” the monks replied. “We have not neglected your master in the slightest.”
San Zang confirmed that in the half day that Wukong had been gone, he had received tea three times and eaten two meals, and that the monks were tending to his every need.
“You can just focus on getting the cassock back,” he told Wukong.
But Wukong said, “No rush. I know where it is. I’ll catch that demon and return your stuff. Don’t worry.”
Just then, the monks had finished preparing another meal and asked Wukong to eat. He helped himself to some food, and then took the sky again, flying back to Black Wind Mountain.
On his way, Wukong noticed a demon lackey walking along the main road on the mountain, carrying a box made from pear tree wood under his left arm. When the demon got close, Wukong raised his staff and brought it down on the lackey’s head, flattening him into a meat patty. He pulled the body off to the side of the road and opened the box. Inside was an invitation. It was addressed to the Patriarch of the Guanyin Monastery. It said:
“Your student, the Bear, pays his respects. I have received gracious gifts from you on several occasions and am deeply grateful. Last night, I saw your monastery on fire. I regret that I wasn’t able to help, but I trust you have not come to any harm. I recently obtained a Buddhist cassock and would like to hold a banquet to celebrate. I hope you will join me. This invitation is being sent two days in advance.”
After reading the note, Wukong laughed, “That old carcass. He deserved to die! Turns out he was in league with the demon. No wonder he lived to be 270 years old. That demon must have taught him some tricks of longevity. Well, I still remember that old monk’s appearance. Let me take his form and go visit the demon’s cave and see where my cassock is. If I have the opportunity, I’ll just take it back, and that’ll save me some hassle.”
So he uttered a spell and transformed into the old monk. He hid his golden rod, strolled to the entrance of the demon’s cave, and asked to be let in. A demon lackey opened up, and quickly went in to tell his master that the Patriarch of Guanyin Monastery was visiting.
“I just sent someone to go deliver the invitation,” the Black Bear Demon said in surprise. “The message cannot have gotten to him yet, so how did he get here so quickly? The Patriarch must not have encountered my messenger. Instead, he must be here because Sun Wukong sent him to ask for the cassock back. Let me hide it first so he won’t see it.”
Upon being invited in, Sun Wukong entered the cave and saw that it was home to numerous exotic plants and trees, looking quite like a divine place. On the second set of doors, he saw a couplet that said, “A deep mountain retreat without worldly cares. A divine cave secluded — what joy serene.”
“Hmm, looks like this fiend is actually a creature that has withdrawn from the mortal realm and understands fate,” Wukong thought to himself.
When he went deeper into the cave, he came upon a third set of doors, which sported carved beams with elaborate ornaments and large windows. He saw the black demon, dressed in a dark green silk jacket, topped by a crow-green cape of damask. He wore a hair wrap of black cloth and a pair of black suede boots.
The demon tidied up his clothing and greeted Wukong in the guise of the Patriarch. They sat down and drank tea, and then the demon asked, “I had sent you an invitation for a banquet the day after tomorrow. How come you are here early?”
“I was coming to visit,” Wukong said. “I ran into your messenger on the way. When I heard that you were holding a Buddhist Robe Banquet, I rushed here to ask to see the cassock.”
“My old friend, you’re mistaken,” the demon chuckled. “This cassock belonged to the Tang monk. He was staying with you. So how could you not have already seen it, and why are you here asking me to let you see it?”
“I borrowed it from the Tang monk. But it was late and I hadn’t had a chance to see it yet. Who knew that you would take it. And my mountain was destroyed by fire, and I lost my possessions. That Tang monk’s disciple also has some valor. We’ve been looking left and right for that cassock. Turns out you lucked into it. So I came to ask for a glimpse.”
But before this charade went on any longer, a demon lackey returned from his patrol route and rushed in to report to the demon king, “My lord, there’s trouble! Your messenger was killed by Sun Wukong on the side of the road. He followed the clue and must have turned into the Patriarch to come steal back the cassock!”
The black demon said to himself, “I was wondering why the Patriarch had come so quickly. Turns out it’s Sun Wukong!”
He quickly turned and stabbed at Wukong with his spear. Wukong dodged the thrust, took out his golden rod, reverted to his true form, and started fighting in the cave. The two fought from inside the cave to out front, then to the top of the mountain, and then in the air, leaving a path of destruction in their wake.
This fight went on until the sun was hugging the western horizon, and still neither had the upper hand. The demon shouted, “Sun Wukong, stop for now. It’s getting late, which makes it hard to fight. You go on back! I’ll fight you to the death tomorrow.”
Boy this demon sure was picky about when to fight. Remember this was the same guy who, in the last episode, wanted to take a lunch break in the middle of another fight with Sun Wukong.
“Son, don’t you run!” Wukong shouted back in mockery. “If you want to fight, then put up a good fight. Don’t use the time of day as an excuse.”
But as he swung at the demon, his foe turned into a gust of wind again and fled back into his cave, shutting the stone doors behind him.
So Wukong was right back where he started. He had no choice but to fly back to the monastery. His master San Zang was eagerly anticipating his return and was excited to see him come back, but deflated to see that he had no cassock with him.
“How come you still don’t have it?” San Zang asked.
Wukong showed him the invitation from the demon to the Patriarch and recounted everything. After reading the invitation, San Zang asked the abbot of the monastery, “Was your Patriarch a demon as well?”
The abbot hurriedly kneeled and said, “Sir, my master was a human being. But after that demon king cultivated his Dao and obtained human form, he often came to the monastery to discuss scripture with my master and taught my master some cultivation methods. That’s why the demon referred to him as an old friend.”
Wukong now chimed in, “These monks don’t have any demonic auras. They’re all pretty normal, just a bit fatter than me. They’re not demons. Master, on the invitation, that demon called himself, ‘Your student, the Bear’. He must be a black bear that became a demon.”
San Zang said, “I heard the ancients say that bears and apes are of the same kind. They’re all beasts. How could he have become a demon?”
Wukong chuckled, “I’m also a ‘beast’, and I became the Great Sage Equal to Heaven. He’s not so different. All the creatures of the world who possess nine orifices can become immortals through self-cultivation.”
“You just said that his skills are equal to yours, so how can you beat him and get back my cassock?” San Zang fretted.
“Don’t you worry about it; I’ve got it handled,” Wukong said.
Just then, the other monks laid out dinner. After the pilgrims ate, San Zang went to the front hall to sleep, while the resident monks had to sleep against the few walls that remained standing. Only the abbot had a room in the rear quarters.
As the night dragged on, San Zang was restless as he could not take his mind off the missing cassock. As soon as he saw a ray of light creep in from outside, he rose and called out, “Wukong, it’s dawn. Hurry up and go get the cassock.”
Man, talk about being a taskmaster. But Wukong leaped to his feet right away and saw that the resident monks were also up and preparing water for washing up. He told them to take care of his master and started to walk out. But San Zang got out of bed, grabbed hold of him, and asked where he was going.
“All this trouble is due to the Bodhisattva Guanyin’s neglect,” Wukong said. “This is her monastery. Since she receives homage and sacrifice here, how could she allow that demon to live next door? I’m going to the South Sea to find her and get her to come and personally ask that demon to return the cassock to me.”
“When will you be back?” San Zang asked.
“Could be as soon as right after breakfast, and definitely no later than noon.”
And with that, Wukong took off again, flying toward the South Sea. He hovered above the sea and saw an endless expanse of ocean where water and sky seemed to meet. In the center of this sea sat Mount Potalaka, the abode of Guanyin. It was a tall peak covered with rare flowers, divine herbs, exotic trees, and golden lotus. The sanctuary where Guanyin resided was nestled in the shades of a grove of willows and bamboo where peacocks sang and parrots spoke.
Descending into this divine place, Wukong was greeted by gatekeeping deities who asked him what he was doing there, since he was supposed to be busy escorting San Zang to the West. He told them, “We encountered something on the way, and I’ve come to see the Bodhisattva. Please announce me.”
So the gatekeepers relayed his message, and Guanyin summoned him in. Once Wukong entered and bowed at the foot of her lotus dais, she asked what he was doing there. He replied, “My master came across one of your monasteries on the way. Since you accepted their offerings, how can you allow a Black Bear Demon to live next door? He stole my master’s cassock. I demanded time and again that he return it, but he refused. So I’ve come to ask you for it.”
“Listen to yourself, you insolent monkey!” Guanyin chided him. “Since it was a bear demon that stole your cassock, why are you asking me for it? You were showing off that treasure and allowed villains to see it. Then, you added wind to fire and burned my monastery. And now you’re acting up here?!”
Oh … you knew about all that, huh? Umm … ok. Wukong hurriedly bowed and said, “Bodhisattva, please forgive my offense. That is how things went. But that creature refuses to return my cassock, and my master is threatening to recite the Band-Tightening Spell. I can’t deal with that headache, so I’ve come to trouble you. Please exercise your compassion and help me capture that demon, reclaim my cassock, and resume our journey West.”
Guanyin told him, “That demon does have a lot of powers and is not beneath you. Alright, for San Zang’s sake, I will go with you this time.”
Wukong thanked her again, and they took off together, flying back to Black Wind Mountain in the blink of an eye. They descended to the ground and started walking toward the cave. Suddenly, they came across a Daoist, strolling along with a glass platter that held two magic pills. He ran smack dab into Wukong, and before he could react, Wukong had brought his golden rod down on the Daoist’s head, spilling his brains and blood everywhere.
“You monkey!” Guanyin said in shock. “How dare you?! He didn’t steal your cassock. He didn’t even know you, much less have any bad blood with you. Why did you kill him?”
“Bodhisattva, you don’t recognize him, but he’s a friend of that Black Bear Demon,” Wukong explained. “Yesterday he and a scholar were sitting talking with the Black Bear Demon about his upcoming birthday, and he invited them to attend his Buddhist Robe Banquet. He’s on his way to offer his congratulations today, and then tomorrow is the banquet. That’s why I recognized him. He must be on his way to see that demon.”
“Alright, in that case, fine,” Guanyin said.
Wukong now picked up the carcass of the Daoist and saw that he had reverted back to his true form, that of a gray wolf. On the bottom of the platter that he was carrying were the words “Made by Master Transcending Void.” Wukong now laughed, “What great luck! A nice break for me, and a real time-saver for the Bodhisattva. This demon basically confessed without a beating, and that Black Bear Demon is going to pay today.”
“What do you mean?” Guanyin asked.
“I have a plan to take advantage of this situation, but it depends on whether you’ll go along with it.”
“Tell me.”
“There are two magic pills on this tray. They are our introductory gifts to that demon. And the words “Made by Master Transcending Void” on the bottom of the tray is the hook. If you’ll go along with my plan, I’ll give you great scheme that won’t require any fighting, but it will make that demon suffer, and make the cassock appear. But if you don’t go along with my plan, then you head West, I’ll head East, the cassock will be gifted to the demon, and San Zang’s journey will be in vain.”
“Listen to your slick tongue,” Guanyin chuckled.
“Oh not at all, but I do have a plan.”
“What is it?”
“According to the words on the bottom of this tray, that Daoist must be called Master Transcending Void. If you’ll go along with my plan, then you should assume his form. I’ll eat one of the pills and turn into a pill myself. It’ll be slightly larger than the other pill. Then you can bring this tray with two pills to celebrate that demon’s birthday. Give him the larger pill. Once he swallows me, I’ll do my thing from inside. If he refuses to offer up the cassock, I’ll weave a new one with his intestines.”
Guanyin nodded and transformed into the Daoist. Wukong looked her over and said, “Miraculous! I can’t tell if it’s the demon pretending to be the Bodhisattva or the other way around!”
Guanyin chuckled, “Bodhisattva and demon both exist in a single thought. Considered in terms of their origin, they are all nothing.”
Taking that bit of wisdom to heart, Wukong now turned into a magic pill. Guanyin then picked up the tray and continued to the cave. When she saw how beautiful the setting was, she thought to herself, “Looks like this beast does have some cultivation of the Dao, for him to occupy such a cave.”
She then went to see the demon lackeys guarding the cave entrance. They recognized the Daoist as a friend of their leader, so they welcomed her in and announced her. The Black Bear Demon came out to greet her at the second set of doors, and she told him, “I’m here to offer you a magic pill that will add 1,000 years to your life.”
After exchanging greetings, they sat down, and the Black Bear Demon started talking about the events of yesterday. Guanyin, not being fully in the loop on the details, didn’t respond and instead presented the tray and said, “My lord, please accept my meager gift.”
As she spoke, she handed the larger pill to the Black Bear Demon and said, “May you live a thousand years.”
The demon returned the gesture and offered her the other pill. Then, just as the demon brought the larger pill to his lips, it rolled straight down his throat before he even had a chance to put it in his mouth. Before he could react, sharp pains shot through his innards, making him roll around on the ground.
Guanyin now reverted to her true form and told him to hand over the cassock. He had no choice but to obey. Then, Sun Wukong emerged from his nostril. In the same moment, Guanyin tossed a hoop on the demon’s head.
Once Wukong was out of him, the Black Bear Demon sprang to his feet, grabbed his spear, and attacked. But Wukong and Guanyin were already up in the air, and Guanyin started to recite an incantation. And the Black Bear Demon’s head suddenly started to hurt as the hoop tightened around his head. As he dropped his spear and rolled on the ground in pain, Sun Wukong was doubled over laughing as he indulged in a bit of schadenfreude.
“You beast, are you going to submit now?” Guanyin asked the demon.
“I’m willing to submit! Please spare my life!” the demon pleaded.
Wukong was not in a merciful mood and wanted to finish off the demon with one swing of his rod. But Guanyin stopped him and said, “Don’t kill him. I have a use for him.”
“With demons like this, what’s the point of keeping them around instead of killing them?”
“I need someone to guard the back of my mountain. I’ll bring him back to serve as a mountain guardian god.”
“You really are a goddess of mercy,” Wukong chuckled. “You won’t hurt a single sentient being. If I knew that incantation, I would recite it a thousand times. Then, no matter how many black bears there are, they’ll all be dead!”
Smarting from his headaches, the Black Bear Demon kneeled and pleaded, “If you would spare me, I am willing to follow the proper path!”
Guanyin now descended to the ground, touched his head, and gave him the commandments. She then told him to pick up his spear and fall in behind her. The Black Bear Demon obeyed, forsaking his wild ways.
Guanyin then told Wukong, “Go on back and serve San Zang carefully. Don’t start any more trouble.”
“Thank you for coming all this way,” Wukong said. “I should see you off for a bit.”
Guanyin told him there was no need, so Wukong took the cassock and kowtowed to thank her. Guanyin then returned to the South Sea with her new recruit.
Once she was gone, Wukong didn’t go straight back to the monastery. He had some unfinished business to take care of, as far as he was concerned. He descended from the sky, hung the cassock on a fragrant cedar tree, took out his golden rod, and stormed into the Black Bear Demon’s former abode. He was intent on slaughtering the whole lot of demon lackeys that served the Black Bear Demon. But they had all scrammed when they saw their boss rolling around in pain while none other than the Bodhisattva Guanyin was looming overhead. Irritated at not being able to spill some blood, Wukong piled up firewood at every set of doors and set the whole place ablaze. In the blink of an eye, Black Wind Cave had turned into Red Wind Cave. Dusting his hands, Wukong now retrieved the cassock and flew back to the monastery.
Back at the monastery, San Zang was getting anxious when Wukong hadn’t returned for a long time. Just as he was speculating in his mind about what’s happended, he suddenly saw colorful clouds in the sky, and then Wukong landed in front of his quarters and shouted, “Master, I’ve got your cassock!”
San Zang was delighted, and the other monks were ecstatic, rejoicing, “Oh good! Our lives are finally safe.”
San Zang received the cassock and asked Wukong, “When you left this morning, you said you would be back by noon. Why did you not come back until dusk?”
Wukong recounted how he and Guanyin had tamed the Black Bear Demon. San Zang then set up incense and kowtowed toward the South to offer his thanks to Guanyin. He then told Wukong, “Since we’ve got the cassock back, go pack up our things at once and we can leave.”
“No rush, no rush,” Wukong said. “It’s already late in the day, not the time to hit the road. Let’s wait till tomorrow morning.”
All the resident monks kneeled and said, “Master Sun is right. It’s late, and we all would like you to stay. With peace restored and your cassock returned, our prayers have been answered. Please wait till tomorrow morning before resuming your journey.”
The monks now brought out what they could from the stuff they rescued from the fire, set up a dinner, burned some paper money to pray for peace, and read a few scrolls of scripture for avoiding calamities and evading evil.
The next morning, San Zang and Wukong prepared their horse and luggage and departed the monastery, with the monks escorting them for a long way before turning back. Master and disciple then continued by themselves.
It was now early spring, and the land was coming alive. After six or seven days on the road, they saw a village estate in the distance as evening approached.
“Wukong, do you see that mountain village over there?” San Zang said. “How about we go seek lodging there tonight, and then resume tomorrow?”
“Let me go check out if it’s safe or not, and then we’ll decide,” Wukong said.
So San Zang reined in his horse, while Wukong trained his eyes on the village. It was a cluster of thatched huts surrounded by dense rows of bamboo fences. A winding brook reflected the houses. The path was lined with green willows, and the yard was covered with blooming flowers. As twilight crept in, birds were chirping everywhere in the woods. Smoke rose from the chimneys, cattle headed back to their pens, and well-fed pigs and chickens slept by the side of houses.
“Master, it looks like a village of good households,” Wukong said. “We can ask for lodging here.”
So San Zang spurred on his horse and they made their way to the entrance of the village. There, they encountered a young man, dressed like a traveler. His hair was tied up in a bun with cotton head-wrap. He wore a blue coat and carried an umbrella and a small bundle on his back. On his feet were a pair of hemp sandals.
While the young man hurried by, Wukong reached out, grabbed him, and said, “Hey where are you going? Tell me, what is this place?”
The young man struggled in vain to try to get free, all the while shouting, “Is there no one else here? Why must you ask me?!”
Wukong smiled and said, “Benefactor, please don’t get irritated. As the saying goes, ‘Help someone, and you’ll help yourself.’ What’s the big deal in telling me the name of this place? In return, I can help resolve whatever is bothering you.”
But even as he spoke, he still did not let go. The young man was now really agitated. He fumed, “Such rotten luck! I’m getting crap from my master at home. And now I’m taking crap from this baldy that I ran into!”
To see what’s bothering this guy, tune into the next episode of the Chinese Lore Podcast. Thanks for listening!
Music in This Episode
- “Luỹ Tre Xanh Ngát Đầu Làng (Guzheng) – Vietnam BGM” by VPRODMUSIC_Asia_BGM
- “Ravines” by Elphnt (from YouTube audio library)
- Whisper3 by PeriTune (Music promoted by https://www.free-stock-music.com; Attribution 4.0 International (CC BY 4.0))