Gods 007: A Poke in the Eye

Hell hath no fury like a fox demon scorned.

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Welcome to the Chinese Lore Podcast, where I retell classic Chinese stories in English. This is episode 7 of Investiture of the Gods. 

Last time, King Zhou had unveiled a creative new form of execution invented by his new crush Daji and used it to intimidate his nagging court officials into momentary silence. But just as he was about to get back to reveling in debauchery with Daji, he got another earful about his sinful ways, this time from his queen. That left him in a foul mood and he swore to Daji that he would make her queen instead one day.

But that day did not seem imminent. You couldn’t just depose a queen without some good reason, or the court would erupt in chaos. So for the time being, the awkward tension continued to hang over the harem. One the first day of the next month, as was customary, all the concubines in the harem went to pay their respects to Queen Jiang (1) in her palace. These included Concubine Huang (2) and Concubine Yang (2), who were both on good terms with the queen. While they were chatting, the attendants came in and said that Daji had also arrived to pay her respects. 

When Daji was summoned into the hall, she saw Queen Jiang sitting in her throne, flanked by Concubine Huang and Concubine Yang. Daji bowed and paid her respects, the queen told her to rise, and then Daji stood to one side.

The other two concubines asked if this was the king’s new favorite that they had heard so much about, and the queen said indeed she was. And then the queen turned to Daji and reproached her, saying, “His majesty has been spending every day and night at your palace, making merry and ignoring state affairs. Yet you haven’t offered him one piece of good counsel. Instead you have bewitched him and steered him to song, dance, wine, and sex. He ignores good advice and executes loyal officials. He has damaged the Shang Dynasty’s enterprise and put the country in danger. This is all your doing. If you don’t change your ways and lead our king back to the right path, and continue to wreak havoc on the dynasty, I will deal with you according to the law. You may go!”

Daji was humiliated by that spiel, but the queen was in charge of the harem, so she had no choice but to swallow her pride, bow to offer her thanks, and take her leave. When she returned to her own palace, she was greeted by one of her maids, who was also her confidant. Daji sat down and let out a long sigh, which prompted her maid to ask what was bothering her.

Gritting her teeth, Daji said, “I am the king’s favorite, but Queen Jiang humiliated me in front of two other concubines because she could. How can I let this go unavenged?”

“But his majesty promised to make you his queen,” the maid said. “Why would you need to worry about not getting a chance for revenge?”

“That may be, but Queen Jiang is still around, so how can he make his move?” Daji lamented. “I need a good plan to bring her down, and then I can be elevated. Otherwise, the court officials will not put up with it and will raise a ruckus like before. Then how can I succeed? Do you have a plan? If I succeed, you will be richly rewarded.”

The maid replied, “We are but women, and I am but a mere servant, so what great idea could I have? In my opinion, why don’t you summon a court official to plan this for you?”

Daji thought about it for a bit, but said, “How can a court official come into my palace? And there are so many eyes and ears here, and they are not all my confidants.”

“Well, tomorrow his majesty is going to tour the garden,” the maid said. “You can send a secret order to summon minister Fei (4) Zhong (4) to the palace, and I will relay to him that you want him to concoct a scheme to bring down the queen, and that he will be rewarded with rank and riches. He is reputed to be a talented man, and he will no doubt dedicate himself to this. It’ll be foolproof.”

“That sounds good, but what if he refuses?” Daji said.

“He is the king’s favorite official and has the king’s ear,” the maid reassured her. “Besides, in summoning him to your palace, you are bestowing a great honor upon  him. I know he will do his utmost for you.”

Daji was delighted. So the next day, while King Zhou was touring his garden, Daji’s maid secretly summoned the sycophant Fei Zhong to her palace. The maid met him outside the palace gate and told him, “Minister Fei (4), I have a secret decree from her ladyship. Take it with you and read it, but do not let it leak out. Once the deed is done, Concubine Su (1) will not forget you. Hurry, don’t delay.”

So Fei Zhong stashed the secret letter and hurriedly left the palace. Once he got home, he read the letter and learned of Daji’s intent. The request, however, put him in quite a bind.

“Queen Jiang is the king’s official wife,” he thought to himself. “Besides, her father is the Grand Duke of the East. He controls millions of stout troops and thousands of top generals. And his eldest son has unrivaled valor. He is not one to be trifled with. If something goes wrong, it’s going to spell big trouble. But Daji is the king’s favorite concubine. If I don’t act quickly on her behalf, she could destroy me with pillow talk.”

With this conundrum weighing on him, Fei Zhong became restless. He thought about the matter all day long, but had no ideas. He just kept pacing around his house absent-mindedly, and then sat down in a daze. Suddenly, out of the corner of his eye, he saw a tall, stout man walk by. 

“Who goes there?” Fei Zhong asked.

The man stopped, kneeled, and replied, “It’s your servant, Jiang (1) Huan (2).”

“Oh it’s you,” Fei Zhong said. “How long have you been serving in my home now?”

“It has been five years since I left the East to come serve your lordship. I am grateful for your kindness and have no way to repay you. I didn’t know you were sitting here, otherwise I would not have intruded. Please forgive me.”

While Jiang Huan (2) was talking, a lightbulb went on in Fei Zhong’s head. 

“You may rise,” he told Jiang Huan. “I have need of your services. If you are willing and do a good job, you will receive handsome rewards.”

“My lord, just tell me what you need, and I will do my utmost,” Jiang Huan said. “I will go through fire and boiling water to repay your kindness.”

Fei Zhong was delighted. He told Jiang Huan, “I have been racking my brain all day to no avail. Who knew you would be the answer! If you succeed, you will receive an official rank and many other rewards.”

“Your servant would never dare to hope for such things,” Jiang Huan said. “Please let me know what you need, and I will carry out your order.”

Fei Zhong whispered a few words in Jiang Huan’s ear, and then told him, “If we succeed, you and I will enjoy endless riches. Don’t let it leak out, or it will bring calamity!”

Jiang Huan nodded and left, while Fei Zhong wrote a reply to Daji.

One day, King Zhou was hanging out as usual in Daji’s palace, and she said, “Because of me, your majesty has not held court in a long time. I hope you will do so tomorrow, so that the officials will not lose their faith in you.”

“My love, you are quite right,” the king said. “Your words are as virtuous as the great queens of antiquity. I will hold court tomorrow and preside over state affairs, so that I do not disappoint you.”

Umm, wow, this was a rather abrupt turn for both of them. In any case, the next day King Zhou and his entourage left Daji’s palace and headed toward the Dragon Virtue Hall, where court is held. As they were walking past the Central Palace Tower, a tall man suddenly flashed out from behind the building. He wore a red headscarf and wielded a sword. 

“You degenerate!” this man shouted. “You do nothing but indulge in wine and women! On my ladyship’s command, I am here to kill you, so that the Shang’s enterprise will not fall into someone else’s hands, and my lord will become king!”

As he delivered those lines, the man raised his sword and made for the king. But the king was surrounded by a giant gaggle of guards, so this assassin never even got close before he was wrestled to the ground and tied up. 

While the guards forced the assassin onto his knees, King Zhou collected himself. He was shocked, but also pissed. He now went into the hall and took his seat. All the court officials paid their respects, though they were surprised to see 1) their king actually holding court, and 2) their king being shocked and angry.

King Zhou now called forth his top commander, Huang the Flying Tiger, and his Second Minister, Bi (3) Gan (4). They were the highest officials at court now that the prime minister Shang (1) Rong (2) had resigned. King Zhou told them, “There was an assassin in the palace. He came at me with a sword. Who could have sent him?”

Flying Tiger was shocked and immediately asked the general who was on duty last night if there was anything unusual. The general said, “There were no intruders or spies when I was on duty. Could the assassin have slipped in around 5 a.m. when all the officials came in?”

Flying Tiger ordered the assassin be brought in. King Zhou asked who would interrogate him. From the ranks of the officials, Fei Zhong stepped forth and volunteered for the task. He took the assassin outside the palace gate, and then came back in after just a short while. He told the king that the assassin had confessed everything. He didn’t even have to treat the guy to any inventive tortures.

“Well, what did he say?” King Zhou asked.

“Your servant does not dare to report it,” Fei Zhong said.

“Since you have found out the truth, why wouldn’t you tell me?” the puzzled king asked.

“If your highness promises to pardon me, then I can tell you,” Fei Zhong replied.

“Sure, you’re pardoned.”

Fei Zhong now said, “The assassin is named Jiang Huan (2). He is a personal guard of the Grand Duke of the East. He came to assassinate your majesty on the order of Queen Jiang, with the intention of making the Grand Duke of the East the king. Thanks to the blessings of your ancestors and of heaven, his scheme was exposed and he has been captured. I pray that your majesty will discuss this matter with your officials and determine a verdict.”

King Zhou immediately flew into a rage. He slammed his hand on his desk and cursed, “Queen Jiang is my wife, and yet she dares to act so unvirtuously. There is no need for discussions! Conspiracies are hard to uncover, and internal rebellions are difficult to guard against. I will appoint Concubine Huang of the West Palace as chief justice of the trial for this case!”

Having handed down his decree, King Zhou then stormed off in a huff and went back to Daji’s palace. In his wake, all the court officials were left stunned and uncertain. They chattered amongst themselves and decided to hang around at court and see what came of this.

Meanwhile, in her palace, Queen Jiang received a surprise visit by an envoy from the king, bearing a royal decree. She kneeled, and the envoy read the decree aloud, and it said:

“The queen is enthroned in the Central Palace. As the highest ranking female in the kingdom, she is equal in status to the king. Yet, she has failed to raise her vigilance, refine her virtues, observe the good conduct befitting her sex, or help the king rule the country properly. Now, she has committed treason, sending her retainer Jiang Huan to assassinate the king at the Central Palace Tower. Thanks to the blessings of heaven and earth, he has been apprehended. Upon interrogation, he confessed that the queen and her father are conspiring to rebel, in violation of the rites governing the relations between husband and wife and between the king and his ministers. The queen is now under arrest and will be sent to the West Palace for trial. The case will be dealt with severely.”

When she heard this bombshell, Queen Jiang wailed aloud and protested her innocence. And yet, she had no choice but to follow the envoy to the West Palace, where Concubine Huang (2) was presiding over the case. Concubine Huang placed the royal decree on her desk as a symbol of authority, and Queen Jiang kneeled and said, “I have always been loyal and virtuous, may heaven and earth be my witness. I have been framed. I hope you will examine my everyday conduct and grant me justice!”

Concubine Huang replied, “The royal decree accuses you of ordering Jiang Huan to assassinate the king in an attempt to give the throne to your father, the Grand Duke of the East, and usurp the Shang’s enterprise. This is a severe violation of the rites between husband and wife. If it’s true, your entire clan will be executed!”

Queen Jiang protested, “Your ladyship. I am the daughter of Jiang (1) Huanchu (2,3), the Grand Duke of the East. My father reigns over the eastern regions and leads 200 marquises. He has attained as high a rank as possible, even higher than the top ministers. He is also a relative of the king, with his daughter being the queen. He is also first among the four grand dukes. Besides, my son has already been named the crown prince. When his majesty ascends to heaven, my son would inherit the throne, and I would be the queen dowager, with the privilege of being worshiped at the royal temple. I would lose that privilege if my father became king. I may be a woman, but I haven’t lost my mind to that degree. Besides, my father isn’t the only nobleman in the land. If the others decide to raise arms and punish us for usurpation, how would we be able to hold on to the throne for long? Please consider this case carefully and clear me of this false accusation. There is no truth in this. Please relay this to his majesty, and I will be forever in your debt!”

Before she even finished speaking, another envoy from the king arrived to tell them to hurry things along. So Concubine Huang now went to Daji’s palace to see the king in person. King Zhou summoned her and asked, “Has that whore confessed yet?”

Concubine Huang relayed the queen’s statement and added, “I urge your majesty to clear her of this false accusation. Don’t allow your wife to be wronged by a conspiracy framed by unseen hands. Have mercy on her, for she is the mother of your crown prince.”

As he listened, King Zhou’s heart started to soften. He thought to himself, “Concubine Huang’s words are quite clear. It does seem like a false accusation. There must be something more to this.”

But just as he was going back and forth in his mind, he saw Daji sitting next to him with a cold smirk on her face. He asked her what’s up, and she said, “Concubine Huang has been fooled by the queen. The guilty always paint themselves in the best light and others in the worst. How can she confess to high treason so easily? But Jiang Huan is one of her father’s men, and has confessed to acting on her orders. How can she deny it? There are so many women in the palace, and yet why is the queen the only woman mentioned in his confession? I’m afraid she’s not going to confess without torture. I hope your majesty will think it through carefully.”

And just like that, the king’s resolve hardened again. “You’re quite right, my love,” he said.

Hearing this, Concubine Huang objected, “Concubine Su, how can you suggest such a thing?! The queen is wife to the king and mother to the country. Ever since ancient times, a queen may be deposed, but never has been executed.”

But Daji shot back, “The law applies to everyone. His majesty spreads heaven’s wisdom to his people. He cannot put personal considerations above his duties. Everyone, rich or poor, common or noble, is equal before the law. Your majesty should issue a decree that if the queen does not confess, one of her eyes should be gouged out. The eyes are the external manifestations of the soul. When she is threatened with having an eye gouged out, she will surely confess. It will let the officials know that this is the way the law must be enforced.”

“You’re quite right,” the king agreed, and he issued the command.

Concubine Huang was startled by this turn of events, and she rushed back to the West Palace. With tears flowing down her cheeks and stamping her foot, she said to the queen, “My queen, Daji is your nemesis. She convinced the king to order that one of your eyes be gouged out if you don’t confess. Listen to me, just confess. No king has ever executed a queen. The worst you will get is confinement.”

But Queen Jiang wept and said, “Good sister, I know you’re looking out for me. But I was taught to respect the rites. How can I ever confess to such a heinous crime? It would humiliate my parents and offend my ancestors. For a wife to assassinate her husband is such a serious crime that it would brand my father a disloyal traitor, and I would be forever remembered as a wretch who dishonored her house. It would also threaten the crown prince’s position. With so much at stake, how can I confess to a crime I did not commit? Nevermind losing an eye. Even if you threw me into a boiling cauldron or cut me to pieces, I cannot confess. I must be paying for the sins of a previous life. I would rather have my flesh and bones smashed to bits than compromise my chastity, purity, and loyalty!”

While they were going back and forth, an imperial edict arrived, officially delivering the command to gouge out one of the queen’s eyes if she did not confess. Concubine Huang tried time and again to convince her to confess, but Queen Jiang steadfastly refused, wailing that she would rather die than to confess to a crime she did not commit. The guards pressed her time and again, and yet she remained steadfast. In the end, they made good on their threat and removed one of her eyes, leaving her soaked in blood and unconscious on the floor while Concubine Huang hurriedly told her servants to tend to her.

Back in Daji’s palace, King Zhou was waiting for an update when he saw Concubine Huang and his envoy enter. 

“Well, did that whore confess yet?” he asked.

Concubine Huang replied, “The queen did not commit a crime. She would rather lose an eye than lose her purity by confessing. By your command, one of her eyes has been gouged out.”

As she spoke, Concubine Huang presented a platter. On it was the queen’s bloody eye. This sent a pang of regret through the king. He had, after all, loved the queen for many years, and this grisly sight filled him with remorse. He turned to Daji and reproached her, “I shouldn’t have listened to you. Now Queen Jiang has lost an eye and still refuses to confess. Now what? If word about this gets out, the officials will not stand for it. What then?”

Daji told him, “As long as the queen refuses to confess, the officials will be restless. Not to mention her father, who reigns over his own state, will surely want to avenge her. You must get a confession out of her to shut everyone up.”

At that, King Zhou fell into silence. He was stuck between two unpalatable choices, and could not decide what to do. After a long while, he asked Daji, “How do you think we should proceed?”

“With things as they are, you have no choice. If she confesses, then all talk will die down. If there is no confession, then there will be no peace. The only thing to do now is to torture her until she confesses. You may send this decree: Order Concubine Huang to put a brass ladle in a fire until it’s glowing hot. If the queen refuses to confess, then use the ladle to burn her hands. The fingers are connected to the heart, and the pain will be unbearable. She will confess for sure.”

“But according to Concubine Huang, the queen is innocent,” King Zhou said. “If I subject her to such cruel torture, I worry the officials will talk. I already made one mistake in gouging out her eye. How can I compound it?”

“Your majesty is mistaken,” Daji retorted. “Right now, you’re riding a tiger. There is no way off. It would be preferable to torture the queen than to offend the nobles and officials.”

Feeling stuck, King Zhou decreed, “If the queen still refuses to confess, then scorch her hands without mercy!”

Concubine Huang was terrified by this new command. When she returned to her palace, she saw the queen, lying in the dirt, with her clothes soaked through with blood. Concubine Huang couldn’t take it anymore. She wept aloud, “My good queen! What sins did you commit in your previous life that heaven and earth have made you suffer such calamity?!”

She helped the queen sit up and said to her, “My good queen, just confess. That degenerate king believes every word out of that whore’s mouth. He will kill you. If you refuse to confess, he’s going to burn your hands. I cannot bear to watch you suffer such horror.”

With blood and tears running down her face, Queen Jiang wailed, “I was a huge sinner in my previous life, so what fear have I of death?! But if you will witness my innocence, then I will die in peace!”

Just then, the envoy arrived with the glowing red brass ladle and announced the king’s command. The queen remained steadfast in her refusal to confess, so the envoy dropped the ladle into her hands. It burned right through skin, flesh, and sinew, and filled the room with a pungent smell as the queen collapsed to the ground, unconscious.

Watching this, Concubine Huang felt as if she was being tortured herself. She wept bitterly and then went to see the king. Choking back tears, she reported, “The queen was tortured many times but offered no information about the assassination. I worry that this is a conspiracy by wicked officials in and outside the palace to frame her. It would be no small calamity.”

King Zhou was stunned and turned to Daji, like, uhh, you told me to do all this, so now what? Which, you know, way to take responsibility there.

Daji kneeled and said, “Your majesty need not worry. Have the generals Chao (2) Tian (2) and Chao (2) Lei (2) bring the assassin to the West Palace. When they are questioned face to face, how can the queen deny it? That will get her to confess for sure.”

Well, you haven’t steered me wrong so far. Actually, I guess you’ve steered me completely wrong so far, so wrong that I have no choice but to keep listening to you. So King Zhou went along with it and told those two generals, who were brothers, to take the assassin Jiang Huan to the West Palace.

As soon as she saw Jiang Huan, the queen’s one remaining eye grew wide and she cursed him, “You traitor! Who bribed you to frame me for trying to assassinate the king? May heaven and earth strike you down!”

Jiang Huan, however, said, “My lady, you ordered me to do it, so how would I dare to disobey? Stop denying it. It’s all true.”

Concubine Huang could not watch this any longer. She cursed Jiang Huan, “You scoundrel! Do you not see how the queen has suffered and is about to die an unjust death?! Heaven will smite you for sure!”

While this tragedy was playing out in the West Palace, over in the East Palace, the crown prince was oblivious to what was happening. The crown prince, whose name was Yin (1) Jiao (1), was playing chess with his younger brother Yin (1) Hong (2) when his eunuch rushed in and told them, “Princes, disaster is upon you!”

Now, the crown prince was just 14 and his brother was 12. They were still kids and paid little attention to such hysterics. But the eunuch told them, “My princes, stop playing chess. Calamity has struck, and your family and country are lost!”

That caught the crown prince Yin Jiao’s attention. He asked what happened, and the eunuch brought him up to speed. Yin Jiao let out a loud cry and rushed with his brother to the West Palace. When they stormed in, they saw their mother covered in blood, with her hands burned to the bone, and the room filled with the stink of scorched flesh. 

The princes rushed to her side, kneeled and wept, asking how she had come to suffer such torture. Hearing her sons’ voices, she opened her eye, looked upon them, and cried aloud, “My sons! Look at how they have gouged out my eye and burned my hands! That Jiang Huan framed me for treason, and Daji gave wicked advice to the king to torture me. On account of the fact that I raised you, you must avenge me!”

And then, she let out another loud cry and breathed her last.

Oh boy! This … is not good. To see how this spiraling disaster will get resolved, tune in to the next episode of the Chinese Lore Podcast. Thanks for listening!

Music in This Episode

• “Sao Meo” by Doug Maxwell / Zac Zinger
• “Dark Toys” by SYBS (from YouTube audio library)
• “The Quiet Aftermath by Sir Cubworth (from YouTube audio library)